To Tribute Blend

Tribute Blend,

You didn't have much aroma.  I had heard good things about you so I put aside your lack of smell and dove in head-first.  I was greeted with winey and berry flavors that lingered in my mouth.  You also had a distinct almond taste.  Overall, I was delighted with the complex, yet harmonious relationship between the four coffees that comprise your blend.  Your distinct personality was forceful yet sensitive to my pallet.  A great tribute to the Starbuck's roast.

Well done,

Me

P.S.  Try pairing up with shelled hemp seeds.

To Black and Tan

Black and Tan,

Ooh la la.  Such a brawny smell and rustic look!  Your flavor was fluffy and light, fit for a princess.  Even though you sparkled in my mouth, I found you rather timid.  Coffees like you need a little extra time in the roaster in order to come out seasoned and ready for action.  I appreciate your brightness, but wanted more depth.  Maybe if the Roastmaster included more French Roast (dark) and less Mexico Chiapas (light), you would have turned out better suited for my taste.  Even though you attracted me from afar, you failed to capture my heart.  Sorry.

Better luck next time,

Me

P.S.  Try pairing up with pancakes topped with extra syrup.

To Decaf Organic French Roast

Decaf Organic French Roast,

Nice and sexy.  I’m told that your smoky flavor comes from being slowly roasted to perfection.  Although you claim to have a good balanced taste, I felt as if you mislead me.  You cannot tell people that you are dark and bold unless you honestly can deliver.  Personally, I found you too acidic, with not enough fullness.  You had too many inhibitions, with no chance of improvement in my opinion.

Give it up,

Me

P.S. Try pairing up with roasted veggies.

To Komodo Dragon

Komodo Dragon,

Mmmmm.  I absolutely adore the way you smell.  So manly and raw.  After taking a small sip, your intricate and husky flavor made me feel assaulted.  In the end I knew that everything was going to be okay.  I feel as if people have overestimated you and perhaps unjustly classified you as an arrogant boss.  There was something about you, though, that just woke up my taste buds.  There are some murky parts of the relationship that I'm unsure of, but I want you to know that I believe in you and want to continue exploring your more stable side.  I'm excited about experimenting and discovering new things together.  Don't be angry if I seem hesitant at first; I want to do this right and figure out exactly who you are.

Oh Yeah,

Me

P.S. Try pairing up with a Cinnabon!

To Christmas Blend

Christmas Blend (aka Holiday Blend),

Whoever created you knew what they were doing.  Your name alone invokes the happiness and comfort that the holidays bring.  I found you comforting as well, though in an unconventional way.  I feel that your taste is for veterans alone.  Only professionals could be able to pick out the clever nuances that reside deep within your surface.  You bring together the best of a variety of lands.  Although our first encounter was rushed, I was delighted upon subsequent meetings.  In fact, I chose you over all others to prove my own mastery of all things coffee.  In demonstrating my ability to others, I selected you to help me shine.  Thanks for coming through for me.  I’m sad that we can only see each other a few months of the year but confident in a good things that will remain a seasonal constant in my life.

Best Regards,

Me

P.S. Try pairing up with brie cheese and ginger preserves.

To Yukon

Yukon,

Needless to say, I had an interesting time with you.  In fact, I consider you one of the most well-rounded and fullest coffees that I know.  Believe me - I know a lot.  At first I was shocked, even surprised at your piquancy.  Now, I don’t know quite what to think.  When I experienced you alongside the smoothness of a pastry, I was rather delighted.  This feeling didn’t last long.  By yourself, I feel as if your individuality shines through too much.  Maybe if your work on your over zealous nature and seek the counsel of others, you will fair better.  Otherwise, I might just have to give out an inconspicuous warning to others.  Although you claim to be balanced, I tend to see otherwise.  Try to hold back substantially and then we can talk.

Until then,

Stephanie

P.S.  Try pairing up with a savory pastry containing sausage or cheese.

To French Roast

French Roast,

I don’t know quite what to think about you.  Even at first glance, you appeared to be the dark and mysterious one bent on winning me over.  Can I trust you?  You evoke such strong emotions, yet it still feels as if we’re a good fit.  There’s an astonishing normalcy when I taste you.  You come across overly confident, but the more of you I experience, the more I realize your heart.  Whereas others may be intimidated by your strength, I have chosen to dive right in.  Mixed emotions: on one hand I am titillated by your depth; on the other hand, I’m not sure I could put up with you every day.  What’s a girl to do?  For now, let’s enjoy the moment and work through the smoky complexities later.

Enraptured,

Me

P.S. Try pairing up with roasted nuts of any kind (salted).